Amish Kill Dogs in Chepstow

AP -  Another Friday, another double header. As the old saying goes there are only three things that are for sure in life. 1. A cat will only eat half a pickle before it pukes. 2. The bathrooms in Chepstow will always smell like a combination of urine and old spice. 3. A double header between the Amish and the Diamondbacks will produce some of the best ball ever.
  And so it was on that fateful Friday that the Amish were about to face the Diamondbacks in a battle for the ages. Both team arrived for the first game ready to play some serious ball. I think Lacey said it best when he walked into the dugout {late}, looked each Amish in the eye and said "This shit's about to get heavy." But noone knew just how heavy it was going to get.
  The Amish took the field with high hopes and low flies. However, the Diamondbacks game out swinging. Before you could say, "Boy, I wouldn't mind giving up a run or two but as long as we don't give up more than 7 and less the 9.", the DBacks had scored 8 unanswered runs. Was the game over before it had barely begun? Should the Amish fold up their tents and head home? Not on your life. The Amish came to play and by God they were gonna play. The mighty Amish bats took over, led by Dennis Thompson who went 4 for 4 with 2 home-runs. James Donnelly, known as the big unit, went 4 for 4. The amish were smacking the ball around so hard, green peace showed up to protest the abuse they were taking. However, after watching a few inning the protesters soon forgot about the ball-abuse and were enjoying some great baseball.
Unfortunately, the Amish couldn't hold the DBacks down, and eventually lost 19 to 16.
It was a tough lost but the tenacity the Amish had shown was tremendous. After a small break the second game was underway.
  It didn't start much better than the first game. After four innings the amish were down 23 to 12. It looked like they may get mercied which would be the ultimate slap in the face. But what can you do? I'll tell you what you can do. Get off your can and get some mutherfrickin hits. And that's what the Amish did. Gordy led the way, going 5 for 5. Scotty had 2 homers and 7 RBI's. Next thing you knew, the Amish we're up 30 to 29 going into the bottom of the 7th. However, with two outs, the Dbacks were able to squezze in two runs and take the game.
After two game like that, any other team would be frustrated, maybe even drop out of the league. Not the Amish though. Their bats had come alive and they knew some day they would get another shot at the DBacks.

  That Sunday, after dreaming about what might have been Friday, the Amish took the field against the BlueDawgs. Again, this was a team the Amish should be able to beat, but had lost their first two meetings of the season. 10 Amish showed up for this one and once again they brought their bats. Young Bryan Muegge, who had missed the games Friday night, seemed to want to be part of the hitting marathon that happened. He went 4 for 4 with his first homerun of the season. He was a double away from the cycle. Young Darryl Dayman made what some are calling the nicest catch of the year, coming in fast on a hard liner, diving headfirst across the terra firma, suspnded in mid air, he looked liked God's marionet. When he hit the ground the ball was securely in his glove. He jumped to his feet, did a little jig and said "I'm a real little boy". Young Kevin Scmidt also had a great day at the plate, almost smacking one out. The Amish scored 7 runs in the 3rd inning, and went on to mercy the BlueDawgs. It was the Amish's 5th consecutive game with 10 plus runs. It appears that the Amish are hitting their offensive stride just in time for the upcoming trilogy of tournaments. The only bad news from the game was a mishap in the field. A hard liner was hit into the gap between Dayman and Shayne. Running like a deer, Shayne made up more ground than a..er..ah...a deer that was running fast. He reached for the ball, unfortunately it must have had some wicked spin on it becasue it hit off the glove and right into the side of his face. Knowing the Amish only had ten players Shayne stayed in the game. Seconds after the last out, he was airlifted to the Cargill hospital of face and necks. He was in critical condition at the time of the article. Our prayers are with him. Lacey read this and shed a single tear.

The Amish have four games lkeft and currently stand at 6 and 9. That means if they win the rest of their games they have a shot at .500. Good luck Fighting Amish, and Godspeed.